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BoldItalicUnderlined. Welcome to insertyoururlhere.blogspot.com

about me


Hello!Most of you know that i'm happy.That doesn't mean that my real name is happy because my mother call me sad.My friends calls me gay.

archives

January 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 September 2009 October 2009 November 2009 December 2009 January 2010 February 2010 March 2010 April 2010 May 2010 June 2010 August 2010 November 2010 December 2010 January 2011 April 2011

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Till today and tomorrow or even the future,please use cbox.ws cause it's the best.

credits


ME:kynzgerl
CODES:consp!re.affa!r
IMAGES:12

Friday, April 8, 2011

feeling moody ever since grad show end. i have come to a conclusion that i am down with post graduation and post working syndrome =(

i just feel so useless. at the first year, i struggle not to break down when i'm just so useless at drawing. at the second year...life is passing. at the third year, i struggle once again not to break down when the stress level reach the height of Mt. Everest.

When i know that Diploma is Awarded...it's just a 'ok, i managed to graduate, thank god and my family'.

i look through those job ads...and i just feel so incompetent.

i use to dream about being able to make jewellery, that never happen. neither can i draw or be extremely skilled in photoshop of 3d max or other software. i try knitting but there's no motivation.

i have no friends with me. every stage of entering school life starts with trying to find a group of friends, and end with myself alone again. sometimes i just think that i'm such a failure. this cannot that cannot, scare of this, scare of that.

i wonder what's with my life, at every stage, i enter and leave with little or nothing.

motivation is not existing in me.

even the courage or even the urge to beautify by wearing contact lens cease to exist. what is left is just fear and indecisive.

it's just worse when other then er jie, da jie and yy. i have no one else i can talk to as friends.

i feel like a log drifting in the ocean, no longer do i have the strength or energy to give a try in life. it's ironic isn't it, there are ppl out there doing all the means to give everything a try and here i am complaining about life.

it's like after all the struggle, it's not like i have become an achiever, after all the struggle, i'm still the old me that's perhaps with slightly more knowledge than previous but other than that..it's still me.

it's 3:56 AM now

Thursday, January 27, 2011

22 more days.

i'm tired of crying but the suppressed emotions are way too much for me to handle. i need to cope with stress, anxiety, hungry, tiredness, sickness and emotional turmoil.

as much as i may need companies in order to move on with less turmoil ... it seems like solitude is what i prefer.

right now, i'm just going to do whatever i can do and not think too much. or at least try to think lesser and not freak out.

sister is finally coming home tomorrow. another emotional support for me.


it's 2:22 AM now

Saturday, January 15, 2011

I'm really afraid that I will break down before the 5 weeks end. I'm trying to hold myself together.I have been diligently working and thinking, thinking and drawing and thinking and editing. It's Sunday...and not a plan is out.

I keep praying to Guan Yin Ma to bless me ... the strength to hold on and successfully hand up all the components for the project.

I teared...not because I'm a weakling. I'm just trying to let off some stress.

HOLD ON! I CAN DO IT.


it's 6:09 PM now

Wednesday, January 12, 2011

It's only the 2nd official day of school. Ain't feeling well now...felt a bit feverish? But I ain't gonna give in just like this. I will fight with all my might to stay in a good condition. 5 1/2 more weeks before everything is over! NOW IS NOT THE TIME TO SAY DIE!

IT'S THE TIME TO PROVE THAT HEY, I CAN DO THIS AND I'M SO GOING TO DO IT NICE AND RIGHT!


it's 8:26 AM now

Sunday, January 9, 2011

The more I type the speech, the more I don't feel like presenting cos the ideas just seems so...plain and simple and rubbish!

it's 8:31 AM now

Friday, December 24, 2010


MERRY CHRISTMAS to all ♥


















First of all, I would like to say a big THANK YOU to Santa Claus for giving me 2 wonderful dreams on the eve of Christmas's eve and Christmas's eve. The one on the eve of Christmas's eve was areally memorable. It was snowing and while busy doing my work in my office which have large windows, a friend of mine came visiting. The reason why I really cherish the dream is because it's been 1-2 years since we kept in touch. At the same time, being not close in the reality, we definitely wouldn't have such a great time playing and talking together. Therefore, thank you,Santa.

MERRY CHRISTMAS ♥ ♥ ♥

it's 8:19 AM now

Sunday, December 19, 2010






I honestly cannot remember the plot for the last video. However, I do know that I enjoy watching it when I was young.

it's 8:21 AM now